Hot flushes? Possibly. Feeling invisible? Not necessarily. A new sense of freedom? Absolutely on the cards. Menopause isn't one-size-fits-all. It's usually described in three main phases (pre-menopause, perimenopause, and post-menopause), plus menopause itself, which technically refers only to your final period. 

The Four Phases of Menopause: What to Expect

The whole transition can span 10–15 years, often starting in your early-to-mid 40s, with the average age of menopause in New Zealand being 51.5.

Menopause Is No Longer a Taboo Topic

Menopause is talked about more openly today than ever before. If you're going through it, you're far from alone, a significant proportion of women will experience some stage of the menopause transition at any given time. The first step is simply recognising that what you're going through is a normal, natural life stage.

So, What Actually Is Menopause? The Four Phases

The term "menopause" describes the transition from your fertile years into the years that follow. It's driven by hormonal changes, though the experience is different for everyone. People often refer to "four phases" of menopause, but strictly speaking, it's three longer phases plus one specific point in time.

Phase 1: Pre-menopause (early-to-mid 40s): 
Your ovaries gradually begin producing less oestrogen and progesterone, and your hormone balance starts to shift. Periods may become less regular, and some women notice their first symptoms during this phase.

Phase 2: Perimenopause (mid-to-late 40s): 
This phase covers the years leading up to, and just after, your final period. Periods continue at first but become increasingly irregular, and this is generally when symptoms are strongest for most women.

Phase 3: Menopause (typically early 50s): 
Technically, "menopause" refers only to your very last period, not a length of time. You'll only know it was your last period in hindsight: once you've gone 12 months without one (or 24 months if you're under 50), menopause has occurred.

Phase 4: Post-menopause (potentially into your mid-60s):
Your hormones settle into a new balance, oestrogen and progesterone drop significantly, so testosterone becomes relatively more prominent. Many symptoms ease during this stage, but some may remain. Bone density can also be affected during and after menopause, and women are more likely to develop osteoporosis than men.

Common Symptoms

Experiences of menopause vary widely, some women notice very few changes, while others experience more significant symptoms. Commonly reported symptoms include hot flushes, disrupted sleep, mood changes, and vaginal dryness, alongside less specific symptoms like joint pain, weight changes, headaches and difficulty concentrating.

Many women say they haven't received much guidance from their doctor on what to expect, which can leave them unsure whether what they're experiencing is normal. It's worth knowing, menopause is a natural life transition, not an illness, and a doctor experienced in menopause care can help you understand your options if symptoms are affecting your day-to-day life.

It's Not Just Physical

Menopause can come with its own social side-effects too — many women describe feeling overlooked, unsure of themselves, or hesitant to speak up about what they're going through. It's no accident that Miriam Stein subtitled her book "Die gereizte Frau" ("The irritable woman") "What our society's got to do with my menopause," highlighting that it's not women who need to change, but the attitudes around them. The more menopause is normalised, the easier this transition will become for women.

Talking with others going through the same thing — whether that's about physical symptoms, changing relationships, or figuring out what's next — is something many women find genuinely helpful.

Three Things That Can Help

Move regularly. Strength and endurance exercise supports your bones, helps you feel good day-to-day, and keeps you fit for whatever you enjoy doing, from hikes to gardening to dancing round the kitchen.

Eat well. A diet with plenty of vegetables, wholegrains and quality oils, and is low in sugar and alcohol, is widely recognised as supportive of overall health during this stage of life. As Dr. Susanne Hofmeister, doctor and biography work expert, puts it: "Spaghetti after 10pm is probably not a good idea any more."

Make plans. You've got a whole new stage of life ahead of you. Think about how you want to spend it, and with whom, and stay active enough to make the most of it.